Memories tied to romantic relationships tend to do that, and I am realizing this even more clearly post boyfriend #1. While I believe our separation was in our best interest, it's crazy how my mind sometimes goes back to what was, and reminiscing can be dangerous at times. I mean memories do not simply play out the facts of what happened, but they can stir up feelings and emotions that relate to that point in time. Memories and feelings cannot be boxed up and thrown away the same way that we box up old cards, varsity jackets, and teddy bears.
There is this song called "Curious" by Andy Mineo that came out this year, and I fell in love with the work of this artist because I feel that a lot of his music could be the soundtrack to my life. I enjoy this particular song because it first reminded me that I am:
A). Not alone
B). Not crazy
C). Human
D). Still not crazy
Even still how do I cure myself of these thoughts? Do I hold my breath? Scare myself? When I change my focus, I feel that they are gone. However, when I least expect it, there they go again. Inside jokes... Hugs... Kisses.... Why did we break up again? Hiccup!
It's not that I want to forget, I just don't want to remember so well- maybe exercise the kind of selective memory that will help me maintain a balanced perspective. I feel that it is important to remember what my relationship taught me, but I cannot dwell on the past. The good mixed with the not-so-good times helped develop me in ways, and I appreciate the lessons. Nevertheless, I have to move on and actually apply the lessons learned to my life. I realize from all of this that if we really take time to consider how much of an impact our memories have on our future peace of mind, maybe we would think twice about what we do and who we do it with.
"It takes a moment to make memories-a lifetime to forget them..."
-Andy Mineo
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